This past week, through the wonders of Facebook, I learned that my former step-sister has been diagnosed with Cancer. Even though she is now graduated from college and living her grown-up life in Texas, I still think of her as being 12 - 14 years old. This was the last time I remember seeing her before our parents separated and I just can't believe time hasn't stood still.
We reconnected on Facebook a couple of years ago and I was stunned by her photos. She's grown into a fairly independent and stunning young woman. We talked about getting together the next time she was in Maryland visiting her family and even though I agreed I never really made myself available. I think I couldn't get my head around the possibility that I might have to see her father if we attempted to meet up. And as I've said on here before, I have no desire to ever see that person again if I can help it.
Now, I just feel like such an asshole. This girl has had the shit end of the stick for most of her life and I couldn't deal with my issues enough to get coffee with her. Of the three children, she is the one who can claim a fairly normal life. Her brothers were always favored by her father, in my opinion, and she suffered a lot of the same treatment visited upon me and my sister. Her home life in Texas, as I recall, wasn't much easier as her mother was almost equally as unstable as her father. Her youngest brother had a lot of emotional problems and was thrown out of school for a bomb threat. Like me, I think she often wished her family was more normal than they were. Yet, she went to college and graduated.
I am just upset with the universe that this person can have both my father's ex as a legitimate parent and be diagnosed with Cancer at such a young age. There is something very unfair about it to me. And I know that life isn't fair and people don't always get what they deserve.
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