Mortality

Upon returning from my wonderful trip abroad, my friend H asked to come over to my house. I immediately knew that something must be wrong because city residents are always loathe to give up their parking spaces. We usually meet at her house or somewhere nearby that is accessible via public transit so that she can avoid the usual headaches associated with City Parking. Shortly before my graduation, she had learned that a mutual friend had passed away. Knowing that I had worked so hard for the last 5 years on my degree and my sister and I had planned a trip for after graduation, she opted to keep the information to herself until after I returned. After she told me, I was stunned. I was thankful that it hadn't been any of the 100 terrible scenarios I'd imagined before she arrived, but I was also in disbelief that this other person was gone. Naturally, my friend H was concerned that I would be angry with her for keeping the information for so long. But I was actually incredibly grateful to her for suffering alone through my happy milestones. I felt terrible that we had all sat at dinner on the evening I graduated and laughed at stupid family stories while she was dealing with the loss of a friend.

It makes me wish that I were better at keeping in touch with people.  That I wasn't so lazy by using Facebook to keep tabs.  A friend of mine was dead for 3 months and I had no idea.  It was a friend with whom I lost touch and hadn't actively talked to in about 5 years.  Part of it was that he was pushing people away and the other part was that I was simply too busy in my own life to reach out to anyone.  I need to be a better human being now that school is completely done.