Fourth Of July

This is now the third time I've rewritten this entry.  For some reason it keeps deleting and I'm not really sure why.  If only I had thought to copy the text before attempting to publish...

In a more elegant fashion, I talked about going over to N's place for the Fireworks in Baltimore.  But at this point I would rather make sure the entry is complete and published so I don't fall too far behind.  I was invited over to N's place to watch the Fireworks and I was getting a vibe that he wasn't really thinking of me romantically and, instead, enjoyed hanging out with me.  I had a great time meeting his friend from work and one of his roommates.  We grilled up some dinner and sat talking about relationships in the kitchen for a while.  The conversation spilled over to the roof time and I just had a great time hanging out with a small group of people.

Hanging out with N has shown me a different side of Baltimore living, one that I would not be completely opposed to, and I enjoy seeing it through fresh eyes.  That being said, as I walked back to my car that night I realized that I was asking myself too many questions about N's behavior and what I thought he might think of me.  It was like a tumbler clicking in a lock and I called him on my way home.  I said that I had the feeling he wasn't that interested, but I was still interested in getting to know him on a friend level.  He said that I was a "cool girl" but he didn't see it being long term and he had to focus on his Med School applications.  We agreed to be friends and will meet up for brunch on Saturday.

I, honestly, could use more male friends.  Right now, it's just M and he can be incredibly frustrating at times.  N also has a social network of people in the city, as far as I can tell, and I think this is how dating goes for 75% of the population.  Meaning you hang out with friends and they bring other friends who bring other friends and at some point you meet a random person who catches your interest for a time.  So the social networking will be good for me on many levels.  But I also felt N was incredibly easy to talk to and I was very comfortable hanging out with him.  I shared stories I don't normally tell people because you never know quite how they will react.  So I am glad that I have that kind of person in my friend arsenal.