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Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Davy Jones - February 29th

I just learned that Davy Jones, of The Monkees fame, has died at age 66 and my day is a little bit darker because of it.  Just last Friday, Dad and I were driving to the airport, listening to Pool It in the car.

I became acquainted with them in 1986 when MTV re-ran episodes of The Monkees.  Even though I am a second generation fan, it still feels like a little piece of my childhood is gone.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Atlanta: 2012

As always, Atlanta is a seductive mistress.  I have never gone to visit my sister and not had a passing thought about moving to the city.  It could be the fluffy white dog that refuses to wake up to an alarm clock and snuggles harder into the crook of your arm.  It could be the slightly warmer weather, no matter what time of year I visit, and being able to walk to most destinations.  It could be the social network of friends that my sister has and how they are always so welcoming when I visit.  It could be the Flying Biscuit.

But really, I think it's being able to stay up late talking to my sister about whatever thought enters our heads at midnight.  Receiving a gift that only has meaning for us.  Having the not so quiet time in the car when we're singing to our favorite old and new pop songs.  Or baking a cake that turns out a little less than perfect.  It's missing out on these moments together, from the mundane activities like washing dishes to the more exciting stuff like hiking Stone Mountain, that make the idea of moving to Atlanta so appealing.

I always have a hard time after a visit.  Whether it's her visiting Maryland, me visiting Atlanta, or going on Family Vacation in North Carolina.  The day before we're ready to leave and return to our normal lives is always the worst and I have about three or four days after where I just feel lost.  There is this very important part of my life that isn't where I want it to be.  My life is full, I have wonderful things going on for myself, but it just isn't complete.  This is the only way I can think to describe it.  I don't know for certain that being in the same city with my sister would be the answer to a lot of the issues I've been having lately.  But I know that things make a lot more sense when we're together. 

Home can be a lot of things.  For me, that feeling is where ever the two of us are together.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Birthday Preparation

There are some days where I have a lot of emotions going through my head.  This week has definitely been one of them.  I go back and forth between feeling somewhat normal and just feeling lost.  I don't know if it's thinking about where I was this time last year or if it's that I'm going to be 31 and am I where I'm supposed to be. And there is this small part of me that wonders if M will send an e-mail to just say Happy Birthday or, if he doesn't how will I feel about that.  It's not something I think about often, it's not something that bothers me anymore - not like it used to anyway - but from time to time I plague myself with these thoughts. 

I know it's the last point of reference I have for a relationship and I think that's why it enters my thoughts as often as it does.  There are also problems with some of my friends' relationships and their significant others cheating on them.  So it refreshes that whole thing in my mind.  It still worries me though that there are times when it feels like it was only a month ago.  I know that I am ready to meet someone new, meaning that I can meet someone and not feel like it would be under the shadow of what happened last year.  But then I wonder if I really am if I'm concerned about whether or not my ex will wish me a happy birthday almost a full year after everything went down.  And if I am thinking about that at all, does that mean that I'm subconsciously sabotaging myself when it comes to meeting someone new?

I'm super excited about my trip to Atlanta, though.  I think it's the shock to the system I need right now.  I just need something different to lift me out of this negative head space.  Something to energize me and push me into a positive direction.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

B-School: First Application Submitted


from http://www.everybodygoto.com/
 I'm not entirely sure how, but my sister has successfully give me her cold.  I had a headache for the last twenty-four hours and was starting to get concerned.  Then I woke up this morning with all kinds of congestion and nasty.

Of course, today is the deadline for my American University application if I want to be in the running for merit scholarships.  I worked on my essays late into the night last night and made a few more tweaks this morning.  (Thank you, Andrea Schwartz, for helping me with that.)Needless to say, this morning I feel pretty exhausted.

 On the bright side, I have successfully submitted my application!  Or, at least, the university has successfully taken the $100 application fee from my bank account.  In talking with my sister, I realize that I'm not really that concerned about being accepted into the grad programs.  Eeven with my average GMAT score and sad undergraduate GPA it didn't really cross my mind that I wouldn't be accepted.  I am more concerned about how I would pay for the education overall.

Possibly this is how I compartmentalize things so I can handle the stress more easily.  I don't have a say in whether or not I am accepted into the programs.  I only know that I have written two amazing essays and worked very hard the last 6 years to develop a solid business resume.  Beyond that, it is out of my control and I shouldn't worry about it.  However, I will be attending at least one of the programs and I will definitely need to pay for it somehow.  In my mind, this is a more pressing concern.

My other two applications don't require an essay or personal statement.  But I think I will tweak the American essays a little bit and submit them as supplemental materials.  It couldn't hurt, right?

B-School: Personal Statement - Draft#3 Final

Man's yesterday may ne'er be like his morrow;
Nought may endure but Mutablilty.

- From Mutability by Percy Bysshe Shelley


From the very first visit I made to the Library of Congress I knew that I wanted to work for there.  The historical, political, and cultural significance contained in those buildings is inspiring and every minute detail of the Jefferson Building contains a symbol reflecting our national heritage or homage to other cultures that influenced our Founding Fathers.  There are many people in this world who, from a young age, know exactly what they want to do with the rest of their lives and some of them are even fortunate enough to attain those aspirations.  For the rest of us, however, our lives tend to be a series of compromises which slow our individual growth and interfere with our professional journey.  We can choose to either let these unplanned events defeat us and take over our lives, or we can use the challenges as a springboard to attaining our goals and dreams.

I was the first person in my family to even consider going to college and, growing up, I was always told I would have to win scholarships.  Indeed, I worked diligently in high school and received a scholarship from the University of Maryland Baltimore County.  Unfortunately, I still had to work a full time job while attending classes to cover the remaining costs but it helped me develop exceptional time management skills. My parents were unable to advise me when it came to applications, financial aid, college courses, or even selecting a major.  I learned to be self reliant in wading through all the information and bold in seeking out counsel from advisers or professors.  I know that everything I have accomplished has come from my own perseverance.

When I was a sophomore in college, my mother's health became a serious cause for concern and the responsibility of her care fell to me.  I spent most of that year attending classes, visiting her in the hospital, and working full eight hour shifts at my job.  All of my careful planning and effort to go to college seemed as though it would come to naught as I struggled to maintain my grade point average while dealing with these outside problems. Taking a year off from school was one of the hardest choices I've ever had to make.  I wanted to pursue my own dreams but could not deny the help my family needed and I knew that my divided attention would cause both to suffer.  In time, my mother’s physical health improved and I felt I could return to school.  I was determined to complete my education, even though my mother’s ill health had set my personal timeline back a few years.

Upon graduating from UMBC, I found it difficult to get a job with the Federal Government, let alone in my field of study.  The economy was slowing down and, without an advanced degree, my future at the Library of Congress was in doubt.  I had envisioned a job in Editing, Substitute Teaching, or the Library Sciences, but my first job offer came from the Accounting Department of a custom home builder.  It seemed to be the very opposite of my dream job and I was surprised to discover how the analytical skills I developed as an undergraduate dovetailed with the skills I acquired working in Accounting.  When that company folded during the housing crisis, I had several months to re-evaluate my professional path and decided that, with my work experience, it was still possible for me to aim for an accounting position at the Library of Congress though not the one originally envisioned. 

During the years I was pursuing my Bachelor of Arts in English Literature, it seemed that my life was nothing but compromises – for my family, my full-time job, and my budget.  My personal goal of a career with the Library of Congress was pushed further and further away until it seemed almost unattainable.  However, life is about change and growing from those changes.  Without these challenges we would not have the opportunity to push our individual boundaries and learn all that we are capable of achieving.  My life has not taken the path I thought it would, but it has taught me that I have the discipline to make my studies a priority, the strength to make difficult life decisions, and the resilience to accept changes without losing my focus.

B-School: Goal Essay Draft#3 - Final

It may seem that my Bachelor of Arts in English Literature is in direct contrast to my pursuit of a Masters of Science in Accounting; however, there are common elements that unite the two disciplines and make one beneficial to the other.  The skills I developed as an undergraduate includes the ability to analyze data, draw conclusions from those details, and communicate my findings to a larger audience, all of which are important building blocks for a career in Business and crucial for one in Accounting.  However, in order to continue to grow as a professional as well as an individual, one must be open to new experiences and widen his or her skill set. The program offered by American University will allow me to further my knowledge of GAAP and its function within Business and, in turn, I will be able to share my first-hand business experiences with a classroom of my peers. 

The study of English Literature involves the development of analytical and communicative skills which are vital to a career in Accounting.  Hours in the library looking for the best evidence to support my thesis amidst scores of academic writing has taught me patience and perseverance.  Poring over lines of poetry, evaluating the meter of the lines and the different connotations of a particular word in order to unlock a deeper meaning teaches one that the details are just as important as the bigger picture.  I find myself drawing on these same lessons as I scour spreadsheets and inventory data in my current position as a Materials Assistant.  The time involved in unraveling a problem in our accounting records is akin to following the trail of footnotes in literary essays.  Because of my training in literature, I notice patterns in data that others take for granted and I am able to draw conclusions from our records that would have gone unnoticed by the typical accounting clerk.  In addition, my communication of my findings to other departments aids in efficient problem resolution.  However, the skills I have acquired as an undergraduate, and refined in the accounting field, are only the cornerstone to the educational foundation I need to become successful as a CPA. 

The Masters of Science in Accounting program offered by American University will allow me to learn proper procedures and processes that can not only be implemented in my day to day job, but also increase my contribution to society.  As human beings, we do not exist in a vacuum and the things we learn through our experiences are, in turn, passed on to others for the enrichment of their lives – so it will be with my time at your University.  With six years in the accounting field, I will be able to provide real world experience from small businesses like Dale Thompson Builders, to large corporations like Hallmark, to government contractors like Safenet.  In addition, my current employer is planning to go public in the near future and I will be able to provide firsthand knowledge of that process to classroom discussions.  My background and skill set will provide valued insights into our learning material that would have been overlooked by the more pragmatic students; I will contribute to a well-rounded education for my peers.

I would ultimately like to secure a managerial position in the financial offices at the Library of Congress with the technical knowledge of Accounting I will gain from studying at your institution, my current knowledge of government accounting practices, and my appreciation for literature.  Simply visiting the Jefferson Building, in Washington, DC, is enough to inspire me and help me feel connected to a larger community that transcends the boundaries of language, religion, and government; it is a cultural and political bastion of knowledge.  Washington, D.C.  is the beautiful combination of so many cultures and educational backgrounds and it has always been a dream of mine to work and live there.  Working at the Library of Congress, I would be a part of preserving our culture, our history, and our knowledge for future generations; those generations will be responsible for guiding our nation as we find our place in the larger world economy.

My pursuit of an advanced degree in Accounting stems from the desire to label and organize our world into easily digested pieces of information, but I can also recognize how those pieces fit together to create an intricate mosaic that represents an entire community.  In my appreciation of this harmony, I defy the very labels society would use to classify me.  I am neither solely a creative person nor am I simply a mathematical one.  I am the blending of two cultures for a well rounded future.

B-School Application: Goal Essay Draft#2 (no Flavor)

898 Words

It may seem that my Bachelor of Arts in English Literature is in direct contrast to my pursuit of a Masters of Science in Accounting, however, there are common elements that unite the two disciplines and make one beneficial to the other.  The skills I developed as an undergrad includes the ability to analyze data, draw conclusions from those details, and communicate my findings to a larger audience; all of which are important building blocks for a career in Business and crucial for one in Accounting.  However, in order to continue to grow as a professional as well as an individual, one must be open to new experiences and widen his or her skill set. The program offered by American University will allow me to further my knowledge of GAAP and its function within Business and, in turn, I will be able to share my first-hand business experiences with a classroom of my peers. 

The study of English Literature involves the development of analytical and communicative skills which are vital to a career in Accounting.  Hours in the library looking for the best evidence to support my thesis  amidst scores of academic writing has taught me patience and perseverance.  Pouring over lines of poetry, evaluating the meter of the lines and the different connotations of a particular word in order to unlock a deeper meaning teaches one that the details are just as important as the bigger picture.  I find myself drawing on these same lessons as I scour spreadsheets and inventory data in my current position as a Materials Assistant.  The time involved in unraveling a problem in our accounting records is akin to following the trail of footnotes in literary essays.  My ability to recognize the importance the small transactions play in the larger financial picture has allowed me to become a valued member of my team. Because of my training in literature, I notice patterns in data that others take for granted and am able to draw conclusions from our records that would have gone unnoticed by the typical accounting clerk.  In addition, my communication of my findings to other departments aids in efficient problem resolution.  However, the skills I have acquired in undergrad, and refined in the accounting field, are only the cornerstone to the educational foundation I need to become successful as a CPA. 

The Masters of Science in Accounting program offered by American University will allow me to learn proper procedures and processes that can not only be implemented in my day to day job, but increase my contribution to society.  With six years in the accounting field, I will be able to provide real world experience from small businesses, large corporations, and government contractors to the classroom discussions.  In addition, my current employer is planning to go public in the near future and I will be able to provide first hand knowledge of that process as we prepare for our IPO.  Most importantly, I will be able to provide a different perspective for my fellow students with only an accounting or mathematical background.  My background in literary analysis and creative writing will provide valued insights into our learning material that would have been overlooked by the more pragmatic students; I will contribute to a well-rounded education for my peers.  As human beings, we do not exist in a vacuum and the things we learn through our experiences are, in turn, passed on to others for the enrichment of their lives.  So it will be with my time at the University. 

With the technical knowledge of Accounting I will gain from studying at at your institution, my current knowledge of government accounting practices, and my appreciation for literature, I would ultimately like to secure a managerial position in the financial offices at the Library of Congress.  Simply visiting the Jefferson Building, in Washington, DC, is enough to inspire me and help me feel connected to a larger community that transcends the boundaries of language, religion, and governments; it is a cultural and political bastion of knowledge.  Washington, D.C., itself,  is the beautiful combination of so many cultures and educational backgrounds and it has always been a dream of mine to work and live there.  Being a Bachelor of Arts in English Literature and having work experience in Accounting, I cannot think of a better environment for these two disciplines to co-exist.  Any work that would be performed at the Library of Congress, from the janitorial staff to the Librarian of Congress appointed by the President, is part of preserving our culture, our history, and our knowledge for future generations.  And those generations will be responsible for guiding our nation as we find our place in the larger world economy.

Human beings have a drive and ambition to make sense out of the chaos that surrounds them; to understand their place in the world as a whole.  My pursuit of an advanced degree in Accounting stems from that same desire to label and organize our world into easily digested pieces of information, but I can also recognize how those pieces fit together to create an intricate mosaic that represents an entire community.  In my appreciation for this harmony, I defy the very labels society would use to classify me.  I am neither solely a creative person nor am I simply a calculating one.  I am the blending of two cultures for a well rounded future.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

St. Valentine's Day

My friend, Crystalsavestheday, posted this on her Facebook wall earlier this week:
“I’m not anti-love or anti-romance or anti-relationships. I’m against hollow gestures prescribed by people who are out to make money out of the holiday. I’m against constant reminders that couple equals normal and that anyone who isn’t in a relationship (or doesn’t want to be) is weird. I’m against anyone with a vested interest telling us how and when it’s appropriate to be affectionate - say it with roses, a diamond is forever, if you really loved her, you’d take her to Paris. I hate all those cutesy bears holding satin hearts saying ‘I wuv you snugglebum!’ - as if love can only be this childish, price-tagged, pukey thing.”

- Meg Pickard ( Oh and heteronomativity that blows too)

It really struck a chord with me and I had to click the "Like" button immediately.  It really put into words what I feel about Valentine's day in general.  I have written before about how I didn't understand the panic surrounding Valentine's day.  At the time I was dating someone so it might not have seemed sincere, but  I am perfectly single this year and I still don't get it.

The entire holiday stirs up these, "if you're alone, you're a loser" sentiment in most people.  Singles find themselves desperate to secure a Valentine with whom to exchange gifts.  Or if they find themselves newly single it's a painful reminder of what they've lost.

Monday, February 6, 2012

A Crossroads 2

I have to call and set up an interview for this week.  Turns out that my transcripts and mostly accounting background didn't scare off the powers that be at the Grant Writing job.  I am still unsure of what to do should this interview also go well and they potentially offer me the position.

Part of me feels so disloyal and deceitful.  I mean I like my job and my on-site supervisor.  There is no reason I would seek out another job, this opportunity just happened to find me.  But I also know that if they had to downsize for any reason, as much as they like the work I do and value me as an employee, it wouldn't be personal.  So I really can't view this the same way, should I actually get a job offer that presents a better opportunity.

Things I know about my current job:
  • I've been doing the same thing for the last three years.
  • There was talk of promoting me to something, but that disappeared when my old boss left for a different job.
  • I don't have a clear cut path for promotion or advancement within the company
  • They will pay up to $5000 a year for my business school education
  • My current salary is about $45K a year - with bonuses and school reimbursement
So I would need to determine what this new job would pay, then what kind of career ladder we're talking about.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Weight Watchers - February Update



Just came back from my weight watchers meeting and I am down 1 lb.! Which means I am back to my pre-holiday weight and ready to continue my momentum to make my lifetime goal this year. I had originally wanted to reach my goal by my birthday and lifetime soon thereafter, but I have to be a bit more realistic. "Man, I LOVE cake!"

Thursday, February 2, 2012

The Terrible Trivium

If you have ever seen the Phantom Tollbooth, or read the book, you may be familiar with The Terrible Trivium, a demon of the Mountains of Ignorance.