Poachers

I've been single for officially a week today and I've already had an opportunist try to take advantage of the situation.  It's this guy that I went on one date with several years ago.  He was friends with my sister when we were little so he was already a Facebook friend.  But every six months or so I get an e-mail from him asking how I am, if I'm dating anyone, etc.  As soon as my relationship status was changed on Facebook, I had a message in my inbox.

It was pretty benign, however, just asked how I was doing, etc.  So I answered.  I know I shouldn't have, it only encourages people.  But I so no reason not to be nice when someone had politely asked how I was doing after my break-up.  So I get another one yesterday that asked if I would like to go get a drink sometime.  I ignored it, but through the fluke of modern technology and my apparent inability to update a Facebook status message from my iphone a message was sent to him.  He realized it must have been a status message and pointed it out to me.  I apologized for the error and hoped that would be that.  Then later I get another message asking about that drink.

So this morning, I had to bluntly say that I wasn't really looking to date anyone right now.  Mission accomplished, so far I haven't had a response.  It just pissed me off, though.

1) It clearly was not an attempt at being a friend.  When the only contact you've had with another person has been solely online for more than 3 years and they don't live a large geographical distance away, it's not a friendly gesture.
2) Anyone who wants to pursue a legitimate relationship with someone else is going to wait longer than a week after they break up with someone.  So this is clearly not this person's intent.
3) This is akin to the creepy old guy at the bar who wants to buy you drinks with dirty names.

This, my readers, is a poacher.  Someone who may deploy the "shotgun method" of hitting on people.  You know, that person who will hit on anything and everything in the hopes that one of them will actually achieve the desired result.  If I were a weaker person, or perhaps a little desperate to find that connection or any connection with another human being, it might have worked.

But the last year that I spent working on myself and making my life better has rendered me immune to this business.  Granted a lot of that work was bolstered by the fact that I dated my ex.  (He was very attractive, took care of himself, had a lot going for him and he was interested in me.)  Except for this recent turn of events, that has absolutely nothing to do with me personally, everything about that relationship was amazing.  He was someone who genuinely cared about me.  That's what I want, and that's what I deserve.  Even if it's not with that particular guy, more's the pity, I could never settle for anything less than that.  Not now, not with where I am physically, emotionally, and financially.