I have maintained two things since the age of 12. One is my friendship with G and the other is my adoration of most things, Christian Bale. I met G when she moved to Harford County and transferred to my middle school. They placed her at the desk next to mine in Ms. S's 7th grade English class. I remember the desks were arranged into groups of 6 with everyone facing each other and I wanted this new girl to feel welcomed. I'd had a hard time adjusting to middle school and needed a few friends of my own, so I wrote a note and passed it to her. As G tells the story, I threw a "book" at her the note was so long. But she wrote back.
She introduced me to several things that year; Newsies, gel pens, and some of the best curse words I've ever learned. Her parents were bikers and she spent a lot of time in the workshop with her dad and his friends. Though her parents weren't bikers as depicted on television, they were regular people who owned and loved Harley Davidsons. Yes they had leather jackets and her father was a big scary-looking man with a full grey beard but he was the biggest teddy bear. Her favorite movie was Newsies, it was only 2 years old at that point, and it was the most amazing thing I'd seen. Christian Bale played the lead, and even though he is not proud of that work, it still holds a special place in my heart. I couldn't get enough of that song, Santa Fe, or Christian Bale. This led me to Swing Kids where I discovered an entire genre of music that still brings me comfort in bad times.
Eighteen years later, times have changed and we're mostly grown-up. G has two adorable kids with her husband and I don't get to see any of them nearly enough. So, I spent my day yesterday with them. I brought her lunch while the kids were napping and then we had a little girl time when her husband returned from work. It is a very strange thing for me to see her with her family because in my mind we're still only 18, 19, 20, 21 years old. But we're almost 30 and things progress. We've become very different people from the little girls in English class and we've become very different from each other.
When G's father died, she turned to religion in a serious way. It brings her comfort and order in a somewhat chaotic world. When we were younger I was the more religious of the two and now I have grown away from that. I wouldn't say I am without faith, but organized religion doesn't agree with me. My parents were both Salvation Army ministers so it is difficult to separate religion from what I do believe, but G and I have very different views on all of this. I am what is defined as a Liberal, though I do have some conservative qualities, and G is now what is defined as Conservative, though she possesses some liberal qualities as well. This has led to some misunderstandings and hurt feelings, but we've managed to remain friends. The thing is that her Conservatism stems from a religious base, unlike my friend J where it's a fiscal issue, and it's difficult to debate or politely disagree when things are based on something as personal as religion.
But I left yesterday with the feeling that it had been a fantastic day. We read to her kids, took them to Target, and then had time to talk to each other without any incident. I think we're both learning to be happy in our lives and it is showing.
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